2006 is bound to be the most phenomenal year yet

• You know how I know? It's because of the way it started. :)
  My good friend Ruth from South Africa said in her lovely accent, "Sandi, thair's gooing to bee a pahty et my flat on New Yair's Eve at ten thahty. Would you like to come? I'd verry much apprriciate it if you would play yor guitah." Of course I had to accept. I adore Ruth. "Howevah," she went on, "Thair's a pahty in Mohammedpur at the Davees' furst at 7:00, so do be awair that if thsir is havey trrraffic, then I might be late." I took that into consideration.
  New Year's eve: I started baking an apple pie for the party at around 8:00. At 9:00, my door bell rang. Not too long ago, my door bell broke, so I had the handy man from the school install a new one. I wasn't there to be able to choose the ring tone, so he picked it for me. I think he very much enjoys the sound of the TikTik. The TikTik is a little lizard that lives in everyone's home and everyone loves them, because they eat cockroaches and mosquitoes. Anyhow, they have this shrill crackling / whistling call and that is what the handy man chose for my door bell sound. Sometimes when the real TikTik calls, it takes me a while to realize that it's not the door and the same vice versa. Okay, whatever, so the door bell rings, "TWERP TWERP TWERP ha ha ha ha" Julian. My goodness but if that girl doesn't just go ahead and bring her thread and needle with her. That way she can sew herself to my side and never leave me alone. She's a sweet girl, though, and a good friend. She just really likes to talk about herself and how much money has been given to her by a Dutch lady who sponsors her.
  "Hey Julian," come on in. I wave her in and walk to the kitchen. Julian's ever ready smile follows me inside. Shishu (the dog I'm dog sitting starts barking it's head off). "Don't worry about him, he's just racist." I explain. And it's true! You know those dogs and only bark at black people or who only bark at men, it's the same with Shishu, only with Bengalis.
  After a while Shishu stops barking, and I finish my pie. Julian talks and talks and talks. It's 10:00. "You know, Sandi," Julian began again. "I have need to tell you something so neat!" I stop what I'm doing and look at her. "You know my Dutch lady?" (this is actually what she calls this woman) I nod my head in boredom. "She is so beautiful, you know? (giggle giggle) She love me very much, I know. Like a momma. I call her and i talk to her about my nak phul (nose ring) and he is so excited, Sandi!" She tends to get her pronouns mixed up. I am silently amused. "So my Dutch lady tell me he, she want to buy for me diamond, can you understand?" I gasp. There is no end to this crazy Dutch lady's money, it seems. "And so she go to look for the prices," Julian continues wrapped up in delight, "and she said she bought a gift one diamond, Sandi! Can you believe it?" I shake my head and sip my tea. "I say her 'This too much price! I cannot allow!'," Julian went on indignantly, "So i ask her the price so i can for to back her the money, do you understand?" (You might not, but she meant that she wanted to repay her for he diamond.) "So my Dutch lady, he say to me it 250 Euro." I choke on my tea. "Sandi, how much is that price in taka."
  "Too much!" I wave my hands frantically at her. "It is maybe 20,000 taka" (which is more than what Julian gets paid for 3 months, and she has a good job.) Julian giggled and giggled.
  "You see, Sandi?" she covered her face with her hands, "My Dutch Lady love me very much!" I quickly change the topic. I can't stand how for Julian love = money. Which is why I sometimes wonder why she wants to be friends with me when we have little in common. She is a sweet girl, though, and has been a good friend. She turned to a picture of my sisters, Anna and Marti. "You know, Sandi, your sister are very beautiful! I think more beautiful than for you." She laughs. I sigh. "I think they are very naughty, like you!"
  "Julian, I think we should go ahead and walk over to Ruth's house. They should be here any moment." We gather the pie and my music and lock the door behind us. The stair well was pitch black.
  "Sandi, be very careful!" Julian explained, "You have no good eyes and you will fall down on me." You gotta love the lack of tact. It never gets old. We creep down the stairs and try to open the gate. It's locked. Where's the guard? We look around and call out his name. No answer. "Sandi, I will go for to look." I do love that about Julian. Where I am too shy to go knocking on doors at 10pm, she is not. Noone answers. Finally she just starts opening doors and seeing if there are people inside.
  "Julian!" I hiss, "Stop that!" Just then she closed a door and ran over to me laughing.
  "I found him, Sandi." She giggled. "The guard is in that one, it smells like a man in there." We knock on the door and the young guard (who should be awake and on duty) staggers out the door with half closed eyes. After fumbling about with the keys he opens the gate. "Happy New Year," Julian sings good naturedly. He grunts and closes the gate after us and scratches his crotch.
  All the while I'm calling those I know who are coming to the party and asking them if they've arrived yet. "We're stuck in traffic!" says Alana, "It's awful, we've been sitting at the same place for 45min."
  "Try Airport Road." I suggest.
  "We just got a taxi, it took us a while." said Ruth, "we should be there momentarily."
  "No, you won't. There's really bad traffic through Banani," I continue on with better directions. I'm annoyed at the situation.
  Julian and I walk through the deserted streets. Well, deserted all except for the ever present construction workers who always have something rude to say to you. We arrive finally at Ruth's gate.
  It's dark inside.
  "Hello, Bhai!!" I shout. No answer. "Bhai, ashun!" (Brother, please come.) still no answer. What is up with all these sleeping guards!! One from across the road comes sauntering up to us to check us out and help us wake up the guard. I don't mind his stare. I'm grateful for his loud voice and Bangla. Finally, the sound of keys rattling and feet dragging across a concrete floor. 'Click' 'Screetch' the gate opens. Another bleary eyed guard glares at us with annoyance. "Understand, that I have to get up very early." he said in Bangla. "Understand that you should be awake and on duty now." Julian scolds. He curses us and slams the gate shut behind us.
  It is 11:30. Sitting outside Ruth's flat in the hall, I make another round of calls. "Where are you now?" I ask feeling the panicking sense that they won't arrive on time.
  "We're getting really close to DOHS (where Ruth and I live). Man, I hope the gate's not locked." Because I live in a quite posh area, the neighborhood gate closes and locks at random times during the night.
  "If it is, you can walk through it." I slouch down, knowing it is. "But it'll be a 15 minute walk." and that's if you hustle.
  On the phone with Ruth, the story was much the same. It's 11:55. Julian starts singing. 11:56. I call Alana "We'll be there in five minutes. We did end up walking." she says. I sigh. 11:57. "Three minutes!" I say to Julian, she cheers. 11:58. I call Ruth. "We're driving through the North gate, we'll be there in five minutes." 11:59. I start counting down from 60 with Julian trying to keep up.
  "Happy New Year!" We both scream at the same time and hug. So that's how I ushered in 2006. Unbeatable, huh? At least we had apple pie.